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Growing Older Gracefully


A Personal Experience Story

My hands grew old. I don’t know exactly when it happened, but now I look at my hands and they are lined and veined. They are the hands of a “mature” woman.

I remember during my newly divorced years, after 14+ years of marriage, with two children from that union, I considered myself having substantial life experience, a sort of savvy woman now on her own as a seasoned and capable single mom. I considered myself MATURE then, but I guess my hands still looked quite young…

I began to navigate the dating world in my mid thirties, mingling in a single parents scene of those my own age, plus many older. I remember what a close male friend always said about having a good indication of a woman’s age by the appearance of her hands. “A woman in her thirties still has that nice smooth skin on the back of her hands…but most that are in the next decade, not so much.” And he gestured at my hands, “See how smooth yours still are!” I was pleased that my hands were still something to admire.

As we would mingle and peruse different single venues, my friend discretely pointed out examples of women acquaintances whose hands had shown signs of age and maturity. He would selectively approach only those who had that “smooth skin” with the hopes of connecting and perhaps going out for a date.

Years passed and somewhere along the journey, I noticed that the skin on my hands had become more lined and weathered… more mature…

Sadly, our modern society places so much emphasis on youth and looking young. Everyone does their best not to “look old” and it takes grace to be open to permit oneself to age in a relatively natural, upbeat, joyful way. In general, we have such resistance to the concept, taught to us by the world in which we live — all the focus on the glory of youth.

So I have come to view my hands with a sense of ease and acceptance — a badge of honor that comes with age and wisdom. Growing older is a privilege I do not take lightly or for granted. And in my mind and attitude, I can still “be” in my thirties…

And in these last 12 years, as a Reiki Practitioner and Teacher, Reiki energy has flowed through my hands — energy that has given benefits of peace and healing to many others. Compassion toward others has manifested through my hands, as I gently place my them on recipients of Reiki in comfort and connection.

So if the skin on my hands is no longer smooth and youthful, I am okay with that. My hands bear the wisdom of my life experience — and that inspires a sense of pride, wonder, understanding and authenticity within me. My hands reflect my own unique journey…


  • I greet each life stage with acceptance and grace.
  • My thoughts and attitude determine my outlook — I choose positive thoughts along each step of my life journey.
  • I cherish the life wisdom I accumulate along my unique personal path.

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